Morning in Arizona

Arizona: Open for Business

Schumer Advises Red-State Dems to Hide Views on Guns

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News Senate Minority Leader Charles Schumer (D-NY) advised Party colleagues facing a tough reelection fight in states carried by Trump last November to mute criticism of gun ownership ahead of the 2018 mid-term balloting. “We all agree that we need more restrictions on gun [...]

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Presidential Library Won’t Include Obama Documents

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News The Obama Presidential Library revealed that it won’t be providing any original documents written by Obama. Instead of having the former president’s manuscripts, documents and letters from his tenure in office—items presidential centers around the country all have—the Obama Library will have space [...]

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Serial Sexual Harasser Sees Right-Wing Conspiracy

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News Hollywood big shot Harvey Weinstein took a hint from his good friend Hillary Clinton and blamed a vast right-wing conspiracy for a recent New York Times article detailing his long history as a serial sexual harasser. Hurt that his generous donations to Democratic [...]

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Rush Limbaugh: Donald Trump Defeated the NFL Because the Country Isn’t What the Media Portrays It to Be

RUSH: The Democrats are trying to connect Trump to the ongoing so-called failure of getting aid and relief to Puerto Rico. And that’s gonna bomb. You know, it’s starting to happen. Actually, I think it’s been happening for a while. The left does not innovate. The Democrat Party, let me specify it. The Democrat Party [...]

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NFL Hit with Boycotts

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Dems Assail Trump’s NFL Comments

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News President Trump’s objection to NFL players refusing to stand for the playing of the National Anthem prior to the start of their football games spurred outrage among assorted Democrats. Democratic Coalition chairman Jon Cooper maintained that Trump’s statement that “the sons of bitches [...]

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Sweden Adopts Stern Response to Country’s Rape Epidemic

 By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News Now that the influx of Muslim refugees into the country has catapulted Sweden to the top of the international heap when it comes to the crime of rape, government officials have determined it is time to take action. That action is the publication [...]

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Menendez Trial Raises Thorny Issues

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News Sen. Robert Menendez (D-NJ) and his “campaign donor” Salomon Melgen are currently on trial for political corruption—the Senator for taking bribes and Melgren for paying them. Menendez argues that the “bribes” in exchange for pursuing legislation favorable to Melgren was “just ordinary politics—no [...]

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Trump Blamed for Violence Against Media

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News Assorted media spokespersons have pointed the finger of blame at President Trump for incidents of violence that have endangered members of their profession in various locations since he became president. Jim VandeHei, founder of the news website Axios, asserted that Trump is directly [...]

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Congresswoman Has Plan to Avert War with North Korea

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News Rep. Maxine Waters (D-Calif) has a simple plan for deescalating tensions between the U.S. and North Korea: “give them what they want.” She acknowledged that “we may not know specifically what that is, but surely it has to be a better option than [...]

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